2022 In Review: An Update Because I’ve Been AWOL and Living Life :P

I really did intend to restart my blog last year. But I’d get as far as starting a post draft, and then forget, and then time passes, and then I’d start over, and restart the whole cycle again with no posts to show for it. However, the reasons I didn’t post in 2022 were far healthier and more compelling than the reasons I didn’t post much in 2021 or 2020. To put it simply, I was too busy taking the steering wheel instead of going with the flow.

Like that seaweed that drifts in and out on the tide and tangles in your feet (and startles the crap out of you, if you’re like me), I have a tendency to just live from day to day and go/do whatever comes my way. Too much planning gives me crippling anxiety, and I prefer to be spontaneous and live in the moment. But I’m an adult human in an adult world, and sometimes there are things I have to plan and obligations I cannot be spontaneously present or absent for. I didn’t learn how to balance this in my twenties, and now in my thirties, I feel like I am only just starting to get the hang of it. At the best of times. Which brings me back around to my blog.

I have good intentions and plans to use my blog. I’ve watched/listened to so many talks about using a blog to develop a “personal brand,” to refine your writing voice, and to keep connected with readers, friends, and families. And I nodded my head, took notes, and proceeded to wait until I had the mental energy to post. Dear reader, as you might have guessed, that ended up being a time I never found. But that was because I was doing other things.

So now, I’ve meandered my way to the point of this post, and if you’re still reading, bear with me and know that I appreciate you. I didn’t post in 2022 because I . . .

2022 HIGHLIGHT REEL

  1. Was editing and posting on Wattpad every week
  2. Was going to musicals, concerts, and festivals
  3. Was travelling and meeting people
  4. Was working A LOT
  5. Was finally starting in on the never-ending lists of books, movies, and shows I’ve missed
  6. Was volunteering and doing things that mean something to me
  7. Was writing and even finished NaNoWriMo (yay!) for the first time in about 5 years
  8. Bonus: 2022 Highlights Playlist and Some More Photos
I’ll go into each one in a little more detail below, and potentially (but no promises) in future posts. For example, under #5, I did an 80s movie watching streak, and read a lot of Brandon Sanderson, and I have many thoughts. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s be orderly and start back at number 1:
  1. Writing and Posting on Wattpad:

If you’re a new reader (I’m sorry), then you might not realize that I started this blog because writing is what I love and what I do. I had a publishing deal that fell through once (another story), and while that set me back mentally, I have never stopped writing. Writing stories has always been necessary to my mental health and living my life, but since I didn’t get some five figure publishing deal and become a breakout star as a teen, I’ve had to live the more normal road of working random and diverse jobs while writing on the side whenever I have the time and energy. I haven’t given up on publishing, but it’s had to go on the backburner for years as I burned myself out paying my way through school and survival.

Which leads me to January of last year, when I finally decided to post up some of my writing in the hopes of having some casual readers and feedback. I used to be on Wattpad as a reader back in the day, and since I was familiar with the site and the least scared of posting my stuff up there,  I ventured into the free-to-read world with The Last Coffee Shop (TLCS). TLCS was a former NaNo project of mine about a tired and stressed barista in a cheerfully post-apocalyptic world, who becomes the unlikely and reluctant heroine of an adventure she doesn’t want (Bilbo-style), and gets tangled up with a clever, dangerous, and oh-so-unreliable bounty hunter in pursuit of a dancing thief. It is wry, often sarcastic, and a little rough around the edges at times, so not for everyone*, and definitely not the mafia-werewolf-billionaire romance stories** that comprise A LOT of Wattpad’s offerings. More importantly, TLCS indulges my pointless love of footnotes.

Considering that Wattpad’s readership seemed to be anything but the types who might read and/or like my work, I only expected a few reads, and I certainly didn’t expect much in the way of interaction. So imagine my shock when a WP bookclub (I didn’t even know those existed), featured TLCS and I went from a handful of reads to about one hundred in just a few months. Those numbers may not sound big, and they aren’t really, but when you consider what I expected and the fact that I wasn’t writing along a trend, you can see why I was so surprised. I was even more surprised when the reactions were overwhelmingly kind, positive, or at least helpful. The bookclub belonged to a WP/Discord group called Dreamland Community (100% recommend), and I eventually joined their server and the selfsame bookclub: Dreamland Raid. Since joining the bookclub, TLCS now has over 1,000 reads, and some people might have even finished it. [Shoutout here to my sister Charlotte’s friend(s) who both finished it, and screamed at her over Discord about it. I have never met you, and I don’t even know your names, but I love you]

While I’m still not as active as I could be, I’ve been getting better, and I’ve really enjoyed reading and commenting on stories that are often far more diverse, creative, and interesting than a lot of what traditional publishing has to offer/will take a chance on. So the goal is to keep going into 2023, and do more. I’m currently posting a revised and edited version of Knight of the Blue Surcoat, a generally wholesome and very unfashionable Arthurian retelling, and seriously considering joining another bookclub and entering some contests here soon.

*Content warnings up in the description on WP                   

**mafia/werewolf/billionaire romance and fanfic seem to be the pillars of Wattpad

2. Musical$, Festival$, and Concert$

2022 will go down in my personal history as the first year I lived my music-loving dreams to the fullest and most indulgent heights. I could probably write six (or more) whole posts about the amount and variety of live music I witnessed, and maybe I will someday, but I’m going to keep this as short as possible and just give the highlights.

The most interesting festival I went to was the Busan International Rock Festival. I finally saw Nell and Jannabi (the ENERGY this man has), and Bastille again (festival Bastille is epic) and fell in love with a lot of new (to me) bands, including Glen Check and CNEMA (angelic vocals, some screamo, a trumpet, and more).

For concerts, there were two standouts: Epik High and BTS Yet to Come in Busan. I have never seen Epik High, although I’ve been a fan for years, and they were, well, epic. They are hilarious, and their chemistry and energy together is unmatched. It was the Epik High is Here tour, so they mainly did tracks from that album (part 1 was released in 2021, part 2 in 2022), but they also did some throwbacks in medley or full form (BORN HATER!). And then Younha (one of my all time favorite singers!) made an appearance and did Umbrella/우산 (one of my favorite songs!) and it was gorgeous. I rarely get emotional, but I teared up, got chills, and had the time of my life.

BTS Yet to Come in Busan was an even more impactful but very different experience. First, there’s the whole part where I managed to get a standing raffle ticket, and it was free to attend. Second, there were the people from all around the world that I hung out with, chatted with (sometimes through the aid of translation apps!) It was a once in a lifetime moment, and I enjoyed every minute of it. The sets, the fireworks, the special effects, the crowd, and of course, the guys themselves, made it one of the most special concerts I have ever had the privilege of attending. And this isn’t even getting into the emotional intensity of the moment. Since BTS (like many other artists) had to cancel a huge tour due to Covid, and they hadn’t performed for a full audience in Korea since 2019, the Busan concert was even more special.

Finally, the musicals. I probably should have had a category just for those. The first musical I saw in 2022 was Jekyll and Hyde in February. I’ve seen it before, and I enjoyed it a lot, so the main reason for going was to see my favorite musical actor: Hong Kwang-ho (I have gushed about this man’s talent and voice multiple times on this blog alone). He was amazing as usual, so no shock there. However, I then saw The Lion KingKinky BootsDeath Note (more on this in a moment), Sweeny Todd, West Side Story, and Moulin Rouge to round out the musicals that I saw for the first time last year. West Side Story was the biggest surprise, being the one I had never been interested in, but considering I saw it with the Kim Junsu as Tony and Leo (from kpop group VIXX) as Riff, and the addition of dance fighting, I enjoyed it a lot!

But Death Note . . . that was the culmination of my journey to Korea, in an ironic way. It was Hong Kwang-Ho and Kim Junsu in the roles of Light and L, respectively, that sucked me back into a renewed interest in learning Korean when I had started to give up. Specifically, it was the video below that made Hong Kwang-ho my must-see artist, and then my favorite musical star, the first time I visited Korea in 2018.

I had listened to every bad audio quality recording from the audience, and I basically had the main songs memorized before I even went. I was fortunate enough to see the musical three times while it ran, and one of those times was with both leads reprising their roles (which they originated in the Korean version), and when I say it was a peak moment of my life, I’m not joking. The singing, the staging, the acting . . . it was far better than a paragraph in a recap blog post can convey. But whatever money I spent on it . . . it was worth every bit.

I ended 2022 with Moulin Rouge, another culmination of years-long fandom. The movie is one of my favorites, for all that it’s er . . . problematic,*** but the artistry. And it isn’t an exaggeration to say that I’ve had that soundtrack on a regular rotation for over fifteen years now. Of course, I listening to the 2019 recording from the Broadway production, and I loved it too (Aaron Tveit is nearly unbeatable!). So when I found out that Hong Kwang-ho and Ivy (another very famous and incredibly talented Korean musical star) were going to star in the first Korean production, I was stalking Interpark (ticketing website) every day for release dates from the minute the news broke. And it went above and beyond my every expectations in every way. Some of the best choreo I have ever had the pleasure of watching, and don’t even get me started on the costuming. But again, this is not the point of this post, so maybe I’ll come back to MR later . . .

***Morality aside, I could write a paper on the merits of the movie, artistic and otherwise. But Hindi Sad Diamonds etc, etc.??!! 

3. Travelling and Meeting People

I’m not the most social creature (to say the least), but I do love to travel. While I only made it out of Korea to go back to visit my family in the US last year, I did manage to travel around Korea a lot more last year. I also joined Gospel City Church in Seoul, the church I’d mainly been attending online because of Covid, and I regularly attended a small group. This led to far more meetups and hanging out than I did in 2020-2021 combined. I also met a lot of friends’ mutual friends, and hung out with people from so many different countries, which was awesome!

Of course, there is always hiking, which continues to be one of my favorite things to do in Korea. But I also did far more urban hiking in 2022. I explored more corners of Seoul, and finally went to Jeju. Jeju Island is just as beautiful and lush as people said, and part of my time there was the long (8+hr) Hallasan hike, and drinking/eating my weight in fresh citrus. With striking black volcanic rocks, windblown slopes, mountainous ridges, and lush greenery everywhere, Jeju looks like the setting for a folktale. The colors of the sea and grass were incredibly vivid, and there is a wildness to the landscape that is different from mainland Korea. Now that I’ve been, I can’t wait to go back.

4.  Work, Work, Work

I’m still at the same hagwon (academy) that I started at in 2020. In 2022, I had the opportunity to teach some more high level classes, and far less kindergarten, which suited me just fine. Some stand-out experiences were talking Hunger Games with our highest level book club, teaching writing to college students, and greatly improving my listening skills by conversing with elementary school students. Our younger students talk in high speed, and have colorful repertoires of insults and game characters’ names. Listening was one of my weakest areas in Korean, and I 100% attribute my gains in this area to my enthusiastic and verbose younger students.

5. Pop Culture – All the Books, Shows, and Movies I Never Have Time For

I read so much more in 2022! Fantasy, nonfiction, Wattpad books, you name it. I also listened to a lot of audiobooks, putting all my hours on public transportation to good use. In books, some highlights were T.S. Kingfisher’s thriller/natural horror novels, Robin Hobb (finally!), The Left-Handed Booksellers of London by Garth Nix, Return of the Thief by Megan Whalen Turner, A Deadly Education (and the sequel) by Naomi Novik, Six Crimson Cranes by Elizabeth Lim,  and my favorite book of 2022: The Red Palace by June Hur. While I read far more titles, these were the ones that really made an impression.

The Red Palace is a historical mystery set in 1800 century Korea, during the turbulent time of the troubled Prince Yi Seon (이선), better known to us as Prince Sado who infamously died after being confined in a rice chest during the summer on the orders of his father. However, the Crown Prince’s tragic and violent story is the background to the mystery, and a sweet, thoughtful, slow-burn romance between an illegitimately born young nurse and a police inspector. Whether you are into history, mystery, or the romance, there is something for you, and even if one of those elements isn’t your bag, June Hur is a masterful, lyrical author who will sell you on the other parts. I highly recommend it, and if you end up reading it, let me know in the comments!

For shows and movies, I don’t ever remember those as well, but I 95% loved Wednesday, watched a great Korean historical film called The Night Owl/올빼미, enjoyed the star-studded Amsterdam, and thought Stranger Things S4 was fantastic. I also finally watched some more 80s and 90s movies (more on that eventually), rewatched old favorites like Terminator, and made far less progress on my to-watch list than on my to-read list, as per usual.

6. Volunteering

Volunteer work and helping in my community has always been something I was highly convicted to do, but was often unsure about how to go about getting involved. However, thanks to some friends and making connections at church, I was finally able to do more volunteering in 2022. In Chungju (the city I live in), I hung out with and did everything from baking to playing outdoor games with students at a shelter for older girls who haven’t been adopted. It hasn’t been easy (they are often shy, and don’t try to speak in Korean or English), but we are slowly starting to develop rapport and relationships with these brave and interesting young girls. One of my goals for 2023 is to be able to do more than in 2022!

7. Writing and NaNo

Last but not least, other than the writing alluded to in #1, I have been writing far more than in the past few years. School burned me out badly, and bouts with self-doubt and depression haven’t helped at all. But thanks in part to my Wattpad bookclub, readers like my sister and her friends, and the generally better place. Just having a writing community that is accessible to me, albeit online, has made a huge difference in my motivation. I wrote over 100K words last year, and I hope to write even more in 2023.

As for NaNo (National Novel Writing Month), I wrote over the 50K words in a month goal, and made progress on a novel project I’ve been tossing around for a while. I also worked on some other projects, and got some editing done. I’m not sure what’s the next step for my writing in 2023, especially since I don’t have a lot of free time, but I am feeling a little more optimistic about where I’m at right now than at the same time last year. Self-publishing is a route I’ve definitely been considering, and looking into that route with more serious intentions is one of the main things on my 2023 agenda.

Well, that was a long post, and thank you to anyone reading this far! As always, comment, let me know what you did in 2022, let me know if you want to hear about anything in detail, or just say hello 🙂

Happy 2023, and raise an imaginary glass to hoping we all are healthier and accomplish even more this year!

(And Don’t forget to check out the playlist and Photos Below;P)

“An Idea is Nothing if it is Not Shared”

I am not a true perfectionist. If you saw my room and my bookshelves, you would know this right away. But when it comes to my writing, my art, or anything I take very seriously (i.e., anything truly important to me), my usual carefree, spontaneous self completely disappears. Instead, I become fixated on the tiniest of errors, the smallest details in my work that suggest to me how worthless and flawed it really is.

I have always been like this.

As a child, I would agonize over any creative work, editing and redoing until there were holes in my paper or I threw my work away in a rush of passionate hatred for whatever idea I had dared to put down in words.

When I am in a more reasonable state of mind, I regret the multitudes of trashed work that I can’t pull out to laugh over now, as an adult. And yet, I haven’t changed all that much.

Of course, this hasn’t stopped me from writing, painting, drawing, etc. Not really. But for the past several years, my creative output lagged, and even died for a time, due to multiple factors (school and restaurant work). But now, living in a place I love, and working at a job I generally enjoy, with most of my weekends at my own disposal, my creative brain has been waking up and ready to start again.

So what was holding me back?

Earlier this year, I was having a soul-searching session in a small hanok (Korean traditional house) in Seoul over the Lunar New Year’s break. I spent a lot of time riding bikes and thinking over those few days, and I realized that my perfectionism and my fear of failure were holding me back from doing what I love the most: writing and art.

Why did I start drawing, or why did I start a story? It was always because I had some burning need to communicate images or ideas that I found worthwhile. Even if no one saw them but me. But if I never even attempted to share them, were they really worthwhile? This question was gnawing me, and I thought suddenly of a tweet I had read in late 2021. Tablo (Twitter @blobyblo) is the frontman of Epik High, one of my favorite groups. He is also one of the wisest, funniest, and most interesting people online. In the thread I’m referring to, he was addressing exactly what I had been thinking about. You can read the thread below:

If I couldn’t believe in my art, turn my “fancies” into real ideas, how could I expect anyone else to?
Tablo’s words became a challenge to me, and finally, I decided to do something about it.

I am not all that good at communicating. I am terrible at keeping in touch, and I tend to disappear and reappear with my moods and energy levels. At this time in my life, I don’t have it in me to pursue agents, traditional publishing, or take the huge amount of time to self-publish something I can put my name on without regrets. So that left free, internet publishing. Still too many options.

Newsletter? Nah.

Serialize on my blog? Nah.

Pass around to friends and family? Nah.

Finally, I decided to publish the same way fanfiction and random drabble make their way on the internet: Wattpad. Why? Because I wanted to share a story, and turn a fancy into an idea. I admit that my biggest fear is that no one will read it. My second biggest fear is that someone will call me out, tell me may work is actually as terrible as I tend to fear. But that is still better than it never being read. And if even one person read it and enjoyed it or gained something, that would be enough.

When I realized this, I was reminded of a webtoon (internet comic) I read called The Omniscient Reader/전지적 독자 시점. The main character is not particularly good at anything other than reading, and he has faithfully read “Three Ways to Survive the Apocalypse,” since the first chapter. Eventually, he became the only reader. When the world is upended and people are suddenly fighting for their lives in “scenarios” that are streamed to viewers (think video game as real life meets The Hunger Games), Dokja (the hero) realizes that the story only he read told the exact way things would unfold. He uses this knowledge to gain literal power as he is the only one who knows what will happen. That story was so important to him and the writer, and I find the metaphor incredibly powerful. To one reader, a story could be everything, and to one writer, one reader can be everything.

If even one person can be entertained, comforted, or empowered, or if any dark power can be dismantled, to paraphrase Tablo, by sharing an idea, isn’t that the real endgame? Isn’t that more important than numbers, popularity, or exposure?

Of course, this conviction isn’t enough to dispel self-doubt. And I don’t really write the sort of thing that could become a lifeline. But writing and telling stories has been a lifeline for me, when I was in the darkest, deepest parts of my head.

So . . . Wattpad.

After all this agonizing, I finally decided on The Last Coffee Shop (frequently referenced on this blog) as a first. It’s completed and generally polished/edited. And no matter how hard I try, I can’t hate it.

So . . . Wattpad. I posted it. Flames didn’t consume my computer, and I didn’t acquire an anti-fan. No one accused me of being the worst writer in the world. I also don’t know if anyone other than my family has been reading it. I don’t know because no one has commented other than my sisters. I am extremely grateful to them and their constant support. But my heart still wants someone to discover it on their own, organically. To read it and connect with an idea that speaks to them. This is still my dream.

I guess I’ll keep posting on Wattpad, because, as I said, the world didn’t end when I put up a chapter online. It’s a challenge to myself, to hone my craft and stick to my own deadlines. To bare my face to anyone who might be looking. To risk revealing myself.

But even if they don’t like what they see, I can be confident that my fancies really are ideas. And ideas were meant to be shared.

<3

Rebekah

P.S. If you read this far and you’re interested, you can find me on Wattpad as WinterFlower

 

 

 

5 Ways I am Using My Time While Social Distancing

5 Ways I’m Keeping Busy Right Now

Social Distancing has been trending for a month on social media, and has caused everything from moderate panic to job loss to downright insanity (has anyone figured out why everyone thought massive amounts of toilet paper should be hoarded??)

Covid-19 isn’t dysentery, folks. But all that goes to say, we are living in strange times. I know a lot of people are quite reasonably afraid – whether of getting sick, or their relatives getting sick, or the ramifications of losing their job for weeks or indefinitely, etc., etc – and this is the same all over the world. I myself will be without income until who knows when, and the outbreaks might stop me from getting the job I really wanted (teaching English in Korea!) for some time yet, as I mentioned in my previous blog post. I can’t wait tables from home, and I’m looking into teaching ESL on line. So I am also uncertain. However, I do have one advantage in this situation: I’m an introvert.

Image result for introverts unite separately meme
Sourced from https://louderminds.com/introverts-unite-separately/

Since my brain has been over-stimulated by social interaction for the past 6 months and counting (10-13 hr shifts waiting tables combined with school), I have found that my creative energy is low most days – until the last four days where I have been mostly in my house with just my sister for company. My brain reawakened, and now I have 1000+ projects all wanting my attention. I suspect many introverts currently feel the same. But how about my extroverts out there? Make sure you facetime people, text your friends, and let people know if you are having a hard time being alone!!

SO, how am I using my time? Anyone who has ever read my blog knows that I like lists, so here are my top 5 recommendations for how to use your time in relative isolation:

Be (stay!) Active

Whether it is walking around the block twice a day, or doing morning yoga, or even doing a virtual fitness class , you will feel better if you are active. Doctors back this up, therapists back this up, and I myself have found, personally, that keeping up with my fitness routine does wonders for my mental health. And hey – what if you could come out of this time looking AND feeling better? YouTube is my go-to for workout routines and inspiration, and I usually switch up my daily routine between cardio, strength-building, and calisthenics.

So for the “virtual fitness class,” I’ve been facetiming my younger sister (who still lives with my parents but frequently works out with me), and setting up a YouTube playlist that we both access from our respective TVs, and then we do the routines together but separately in real time. It’s more fun, and keeps us both motivated. If you have offline friends who are also missing weekly Zumba, yoga, or gym meetup, etc., then you should definitely consider doing this so you can still work out “together.”

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-x0Xl4bh4rGZ5sxFcGx7ceVH6-M4bd7y
A Link to My Current Workout Playlist – I usually workout for 45 minutes to 65 minutes a day with Sunday as a rest day, and alternate yoga days with cardio + yoga

My favorite and most used YouTube Fitness channels are Blogilates (pictured above), Yoga With Adriene, Leilah Isaac (Bellydance/Dance Fitness), Kpop Fitness (Puts fitness videos to kpop), Cardio Party Mashup (Cardio set to music), Emi Wong (General routines), Mark Kramer Pastrana (Dance Fitness/Zumba), and Chris Heria (Calisthenics and strength-building). Let me know if you have any recs in the comments! (Or if you try any of these out)

Get Creative – Pull out those projects

Working on something I love is not only therapeutic, I love to see things accomplished. Even if you aren’t “creative,” now is the time to work on a project that interests you. Organizing the garage? Building a shelf? Coloring a page in that adult coloring book you received as a gift three birthdays ago? Especially if you have kids, getting out some paper and colored pencils or watercolors is a great way to flex your creative muscles. Use some plain white cardstock and draw pictures or decorate your letters to make cards to send to friends and family also self-isolating. Bloggers and pinterest boards have literally thousands of ideas for all skill levels and attention spans.You might discover a new passion or hobby – who knows?

I love words and typography art, and I used to draw all the time. I combined that with my love of textile and clothing design, and I have been using a plain pair of cream-colored jeans as a canvas for the type of collage/word-art stuff I used to do in high-school. Not only is it fun, it’s nostalgic and something I haven’t had much time for in the past few years. I put on my crafting playlist (see the end of this post), and just start where I feel like it.

Lyrics/Quotes Credits: Icarus by Bastille (from “Bad Blood”) , Interlude: Shadow by BTS (From Map of the Soul: 7) – Icarus drawing by me

So maybe this feels too overwhelming? There is a ton of art and literature already out there for us to enjoy, which brings me to my third way of spending time:

Read, read, read

Scribd.com just made their library of ebooks and audiobooks free for thirty days if you sign up at the website (I just did!). Even if you don’t want to sit down and read, consider listening to an audiobook while you’re cleaning or coloring or doing dishes.

Of course, with libraries shut down, it might be harder to find physical books you want to read – but I guarantee you or someone you know has books sitting around waiting to be read “someday.” Just pick one up and start reading. Many libraries also have ebook libraries that members can access, so check out your local libraries’ websites. And hey – ebooks are cheaper than regular books, so why not purchase a book or two if you have a little money you can spend? My go-to is fantasy, as that is the genre I tend to find the most books I enjoy in.

If you like fantasy, fairytale retellings, or paranormal – check out W.R. Gingell’s collection of varied and fun ebooks here. Her ebook titles are under $5 and she is a talented author that will appeal to fans of Jessica Day George, Diana Wynne Jones, and Gail Carson Levine. Alternatively – you should read Wicked Fox by Kat Cho – it’s like a Korean drama YA style that vividly modernizes the Gumiho (tailed-fox) set in Seoul, with a lot of heart and angst and adventure. It also made me hungry (the descriptions of Korean food, lol).

Not a fan of the romance and “happy” endings? R.F Kuang‘s The Poppy War and The Dragon Republic are epic dark fantasy – fantastically written and imagined. But be advised that they contain graphic violence, adult themes and language, and characters that will 100% make you frustrated.

Alternatively, if you want to read but have trouble sitting still and focusing (like me), try Webtoons or comics. I love Webtoons (a little too much – I am subscribed to 30+ series and have stayed up till 2am reading them too many times). It’s a great time to find independent artists, authors, and illustrators to support with your time and/or money. Webtoons.com is available in many languages, and is accessible from any computer, phone, or tablet. Some series I love include Save Me (Drama), Rot & Ruin – The Webtoon (an adaptation of Jonathan Mayberry’s YA series that I LOVE*), Eleceed (Superhero-type individuals and CATS), and Not Even Bones (another YA adaptation that makes me want to read the book 100% more not). There is something for everyone.

Write. Or Start Writing

Whether it is a letter to a friend, a journal of your thoughts and emotions, or that novel you have been sitting on, there has never been a better time to write. I am setting aside time every day to either blog or work on one of my novels-in-progress/editing. Getting words on paper does wonders for my mental health, and I have many friends who also feel that putting a pen to paper (or typing) helps them think better. So if you’re feeling things because of everything going on – write about it, even if it’s just for you to read back on in ten years. If you have a cool hobby, now is a good time to write or blog about it for people who are bored and need something to read (see above).

If you are already a writer (like yours truly), now is a good time to edit, edit, edit! Considering a professional editor, or querying agents, or even looking into self-publishing are things that can all be done in times of social isolation. I am currently looking into self-publishing (so much work, yikes!), and juggling WIPs, so I have a lot of things to do for the next few weeks. I’m grateful for the time to devote to something I love, and I’m trying to think about that instead of what the loss of income means for me.

And you know what – sometimes it is too much to create, or read, or write, or even clean. In those times, video games and streaming services are there. But why not make a party of it – leading to my final way of spending social isolation:

Netflix Party! (Or Disney +, Hulu, Vudu, etc.)

Want to watch a show or movie with friends, but you can’t go sit with them irl? Well, there is a Chrome extension called Netflix party that will let you watch and comment in real time with your friends if they are also using it. Alternatively, watch the same show and use Facebook Messenger chats, WhatsApp, Kakao Talk, Google Hangouts, or any similar method to discuss the show/movie with your friends while watching. You can do this with books too – and have a virtual bookclub. And if you are the person who keeps a running commentary during a movie (this annoys a lot of people, I know), then here is a quiet way of doing just that – but quietly. And no one in your own house will (probably) get mad at you for having your phone screen on while watching. Make it more fun by cooking snacks and sharing photos in the chat. I could write a whole other post on recommendations, but I’ll just my current top 3, and please let me know if you have watched them, or if you have any recommendations!

  • If you like The Walking Dead, Grimm, Supernatural, Return of the King, Train to Busan, Game of Thrones, Underworld, or A Quiet Place, watch Kingdom (Netflix). Kingdom is a historical thriller set in Joseon Dynasty Korea involving both political intrigue and zombies. I could write a post about why it is one of the best shows ever (and maybe I will), but if you like any/all of the above titles, and want to see phenomenal cinematography, costumes, special effects, and writing along with your usual zombie horror, then Kingdom is what you’ve been waiting for. (Note: This show deserves the MA rating – it is frequently violent and disturbing due to the subject matter, and neither the zombies nor the corrupt government officials spare innocents)
The internet is (rightfully) obsessed with the numerous fantastic Joseon Dynasty hats
  • If you like westerns, The Lone Ranger, The Seven Samurai, Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, or Star Wars Rebels, watch The Mandalorian (Disney +). Everyone has seen baby Yoda from this show, but you have to actually watch it to understand how painfully adorable the small alien and his guardian (adoptive father) are together. You too would risk everything for baby Yoda after two episodes. Cuteness aside, the writing and directing are solid, with a western, lone gunman feel that is refreshing and fun to watch. It’s more about character and story than many shows on tv, and also pretty family friendly, hanging out in the PG/PG-13 range. My only complaint is that we all have to wait for a second season now . . .
This man’s mask has more varied expressions than many actors I won’t name . . .
  • If you like Beauty and the Beast (any version), Jane Eyre, Labyrinth, Pride and Prejudice, Goblin (Korean Drama), redemption arcs, The Sixth Sense, Once Upon a Time, Grimm, and costume dramas, watch Hotel Del Luna (Viki.com). With gorgeous costumes, soundtrack, (and actors), and a lot of ghosts, this unusual Beauty and the Beast + Count of Monte Cristo + Sixth Sense-esque drama is thoroughly captivating. While the story starts off slow, the interesting characters, individual ghost stories, and the well-handled themes of redemption and forgiveness made this show really stand out. Also, IU (singer and actress) as the lead antagonist/female lead Jang Man-wol, an immortal (?) and mysterious owner of a hotel for ghosts lost between life and the afterlife, is fantastic. Man-wol is the type of character that is generally male, and the role-reversal (a sensitive, morally upstanding, and brave male lead) makes this show even more fun. Hangs out at solidly TV-14 – with some violence, adult subject matter including suicide and murder, some frightening images, and minor innuendo.
More fantastic hats – joined by fantastic dresses

As a side note – if you haven’t watched Stranger Things (Netflix) yet, I highly recommend it. It’s as good as people say, and a really fun concept. And there are 3 seasons (with a 4th on the way). It’s short and smart and well-written, and deserves the praise.

So there you have it – some advice from an introvert and how I’ll be spending my time during social-distancing. Let me know if you have recs, ideas, or just if you want to Talk 🙂 See you soon!
Eclectic? Naturally. And I update frequently

*If anything, the Rot & Ruin Webtoon reminded me that my torch for Tom Imura will never go out.

#WritingLife – How I Get Myself Writing When I’m Uninspired

So my previous post was about music and how it encourages me when I’m feeling low, right? (And there was a significant segment about BTS, but that was related) Anyhow, that post got me thinking about all the ways I have combated creative slumps in the past, with more or less success.

First off – we must acknowledge that sometimes you just can’t write. Even if you want to. I have experienced this frequently over the past year. I have an idea, see the plot and the characters coming together in my brain, and then I sit down and I can’t write anything at all.

Too much of this isn’t just frustrating, it’s extremely depressing. It’s a terrible place for creative people to be. For me (and I suspect many others), the act of making art – of any kind – is a compulsion and a need. Even if no one ever sees it but you, you have to get it out. That’s the best way I can describe it. (Actually, the analogy of a backed up drain comes to mind, but that’s some gross imagery you probably don’t want to read).

The point is, a creative slump is a dark place, and that can be hard to explain to people who don’t feel the same way.

So last year was the deepest dip of a 2 year slump that was partially induced by going back to school and working every spare hour. Statistically speaking, I wasn’t getting enough sleep or nourishment to be doing my best work at any time. Which meant the 3% of brain power I had was devoted to doing as well as possible in my classes, and then into waiting tables with as much of a positive, decent human being face as I could manage. And sometimes that sort of work is necessary to get what you want.

Basically my brain

I couldn’t be here in Korea now studying if I had slacked off or let myself breathe more. But a side effect of all this was my creative side was getting progressively more sluggish, lazy, and out of shape.

However, as anyone following my blog return might notice, I have been slowly reintroducing regular writing and reading back into my schedule, and working on whipping the creative side back into some sort of usable fitness level. In the past, I’ve made the mistake of trying to go back all at once, and we know that works as well as crash dieting (to continue the metaphor). A week or so you do great, and then you fail in an epic way. Same with getting back into writing and art. It doesn’t work in the long-term.

So what does work? Well, same as using the fitness advice above – things don’t work the same for everyone – but here are the top 5 “exercises” I have done to successfully break out of creative slumps past and present.

  1. Go outside

I cannot stress this one enough. Being indoors all day long (especially studying or in classes) is mind-numbing and takes all your energy. You will feel much better if you get fresh air and change your scenery. If possible, leave the work for an hour and take a bike ride, walk a few blocks, and just look around you at the scenery. If you can’t focus, put in some headphones and observe the world from inside the bubble of your favorite songs. The reason this is my number one tip is because it is easy and almost always works. It’s not magic, but it’s the closest thing. Since I have been in Korea, I have been taking a walk or exercising almost every day. Not only does it get the blood flowing and release those positive endorphins, the scenery around Pohang is gorgeous and inspiring, and it has helped me get and stay in a writing/creative mood.

2. Start Small

If you can’t write a chapter, write a blog post. If you can’t write a post, take some pictures . If that’s too hard, make a Pinterest board for a new character or project. Draw a comic strip of how you feel and post it on Instagram. Write a poem if you don’t want to draw a picture. Actually, if there is any other creative hobby you enjoy: do a small amount of it! If it’s cooking, bake cookies. If it’s knitting, knit a row or two. Whatever it is, just do what you can manage for the day. The best thing about things like knitting or photography is that you get some instant gratification – even if a project isn’t perfect or finished, you still get to see achievement.

Current project – knit while watching Suits (Korean Version) 🙂

3. Talk through Your Project

This one isn’t as simple because it can’t be as easily done by yourself (but it can be!). Find a sympathetic ear and outline your project, talking through the problems, goals, and design. If no one wants to listen, type up the conversation, or write it on paper and use it as a way to brainstorm and plan. For example, if I have a novel idea, I always jot it down even if I don’t feel like writing. If I am stuck there, then I write out aspects of the plot or characters that occur to me, grouping them by character name or plotline (which I usually number). This is something I do at the beginning of a project, but also when I am stuck halfway. Usually I call my (very patient) sister and talk through the project in detail. Another person’s perspective can be really useful, and often you’ll find that just verbalizing what you are doing can help you figure out problems on your own.

Say it just like this and they’ll listen for at least a minute

4. Read/Research

Don’t groan. If you’re a writer, knowing your subject inside and out can help you write more freely when you are in the mood, instead of making you stop to check facts or details every thirty seconds. It is also extremely important to thoroughly know your subject and have hours of study/experience if you are writing about something unfamiliar (a different country, a special skill, etc). For example, field research like getting involved in soccer and reading up on the international names in the sport is a good foundation for writing a soccer-themed novel (obvious, but you can’t say it enough).

If you are an artist, researching and reading about other techniques can also help generate inspiration. From blogs to scholarly articles, there is always an expert somewhere to consult! Also, especially if you are a writer, reading other novels, especially outside your genre, is a great way to recharge and spark your imagination. In addition, it’s your chance to learn from others’ successes and mistakes, so you can apply that knowledge to your own project. Research isn’t just academic either – it can be museum visits, historical site trips, or even watching movies/shows that are on your topic. If it gets you inspired and ready to be creative, then it isn’t a waste of time and energy 🙂

5. Take a nap.

Naps are the saving grace of the student/part-time worker’s life. If you can’t keep your eyes open, or you feel sluggish and lethargic, shut your books or computer, set a timer, and allow yourself to rest. Don’t look at your phone, turn off the lights, and do breathing exercises or something else that will help you relax.

Same Suga/민윤기씨. Same.

If you’re busy and sleep-deprived, then you know why your brain isn’t working, and a power nap, or even just a rest, can help you recharge enough to make a difference. Sometimes, if I’m tired but not falling asleep, I try to mentally immerse myself in the world of a story I’m working on. I imagine the daily life of a character, their conversations, what they look like – and by that time, I usually fall asleep! If not, I have some details to write down for that story.

And like I said above – set a timer otherwise, if you are like me, you will sleep and sleep and then miss something you should have been doing!

So there you have it:  my top 5 tips for dealing with creative slumps ! What about you – do you have any tips or tricks for breaking out of the bad cycles? Are any of them the same? If so, I want to hear about them!

 

2018.08.25: 1:00 AM – Love Yourself?

Before I start – I’ll warn you – this post rambles, is really long, and it gets personal – and there is a lot about music. Also – I linked every song mentioned so you can find them if you like!

You know how you just start pondering life when you go to bed, and then you’re up until 3Am, just lost in thought (or maybe even having some sort of crisis)? I do this a lot, and it can be a problem, but it can also lead to good insight.

Whether you’re replaying a conversation a thousand times, or panicking because you have to pay tuition for another two semesters, this sort of thing always hits after midnight, am I right?

“You Are the Moon,” The Hush Sound

Anyhow – anyone reading this probably knows how “musically affected” I am. Words already push so many buttons in my mind, and when you set them to music – make them an anthem or a mantra of sorts, then it’s no surprise that music can be such a big part of my mental health.

Sometimes I have to put in my headphones to escape the noise, chaos, and distractions surrounding me (and everything distracts me). Better still is putting in my headphones and heading outside. It’s a strange paradox (and I think a lot of introverts would relate), but if I feel lonely, I tend to head for even more solitude (??) and put in the headphones. Whether it’s the voice, the familiarity, or the words – music I love has a way of making me feel like I’m not alone.

“Iron” – Within Temptation

Good lyrics (and songs) connect you through experience and feelings and remind you that other people have felt the same way, or dealt with similar things.

Do you ever have that eerie tingling familiarity when you hear a song for the first time? Like you could have written it, or that it put what you were feeling into words that you weren’t able to express? This happens with novels and poetry too – when a certain line grabs you and makes you pause to reread it. Those are some of my favorite moments when I read too, and it’s one of the reasons I love words so much.

“Alone Together,” Fall Out Boy

That’s also why a concert crowd full of strangers is often less lonely than a room full of casual friends or acquaintances. At a concert by yourself – you’re alone together – all there for the same reason,  united by music. But if you’re like me and you have a hard time really bonding and seem to slip through the cracks of social interaction . . . then the room full of acquaintances (especially if there are some established friend groups in there) can be the loneliest place in the world.

“The Light Behind Your Eyes,” My Chemical Romance

 

In a lot of ways, school has been that kind of lonely for me. I was always that person who didn’t fit in – I could  get along with anyone – but that was all. As I’ve mentioned in other posts – being older than everyone sometimes is an automatic barrier – whether it’s the constant working on my side, or them feeling uncomfortable because I’m 5-7 years older (that’s not even that much!)

And I’ll be honest and say that yes – I am frequently awkward and inept in social situations I am not paid to deal with (i.e, anywhere outside of work!). Sometimes I can’t think of anything to say, and other times, it seems like nothing I say matters regardless. I’m torn between wanting to connect to other people, and wanting to retreat into myself. And spending too much time in your own head is unhealthy.

“Let You Down,” NF

So that was a pretty long introduction, I know – but the point is – this is how I am and who I am and I’ve struggled to accept many things about myself for years. I won’t get into the details, but the last two years at school and work in Grand Rapids have been difficult. I stopped blogging, I almost stopped reading and writing completely. There were weeks when the only people I saw or talked to face-to-face were co-workers and customers, and it was draining.

“New Beautiful” – Epik High

I spent a lot of time praying, and probably more time being angry. In those times, when I was holding pain inside and I didn’t want to talk about it – that was when I would just listen to music and hold onto the words – because someone out there felt the same way, and we were linked by the song. No matter where I’ve been in my life or over the years – songs, poems, and books were friends that would never leave or lose interest. That is why I am so grateful for every singer or writer I’ve connected with – and I hope that every one of them knows that they make a difference with their words and their gifts.

What got me off on this tangent was that all ^this^ was what I was thinking about at 1:00 am on a Saturday morning in South Korea. Music and loneliness.

“Northern Downpour,” Panic! at the Disco

The day before, Friday, August 24th, was the end of our orientation into HGU, and after the long week in a new place, we celebrated until late that night (see my last post), and when I finally collapsed into bed, my mind was still very awake. Part of it was concerns about the coming semester (money, will I be able to work on Korean if I’m with International Students, money, can I travel?, how will I pay for tuition when I get back?, what if I can’t settle in? oh, and did I mention money?) and part of it was because that Friday was the day that BTS (방탄소년단) dropped their new(ish) repackaged album Love Yourself 結 ‘Answer, the final album in a three-part release, beginning with Love Yourself 承 ‘Her.’  Second was Love Yourself 轉 ‘Tear’ – which had an aesthetic that resonated so deeply it got me out of the aforementioned creative slump (for real). . .

Anyone who reads my Twitter feed saw me gushing about the “Singularity” aesthetic earlier this year. *still haven’t recovered*

So of course, I was pretty excited to see what Answer had to offer. Especially after we got yet another beautiful song trailer with meaningful lyrics (just stick with me – I promise this relates to the rest of the post!)

Self-acceptance is the theme this time around

ALSO this trilogy is actually continuing a series that the guys first began in 화양연화 pt.1  (The Most Beautiful Moments in Life or HYYH ), which feature a sort of alternate universe populated by characters with the members’ names and a complex storyline. The lyrics, videos, notes, and concepts of all their albums since have been tied to this storyline, but also featured many references to literature, art, pop culture, and even current events. (See Wings)

Art Credit @ Mar5122 via DeviantArt Lyrics – “Intro: Nevermind” – BTS

There are people who have a lot of smarter stuff to write about this than I do (links below!), and super talented translators who spend their own, unpaid time to translate lyrics and notes (and I like to do my own translations, but I am not that good and I am sloooow – links to the masters below**).

Anyhow, the point is, if you are a book nerd or a concept album nut (I am both, as should be obvious by now), you love it when bands do this. Some of my all-time favorite bands have done equally elaborate things (Within Temptation did a film series, while MCR had comics and videos, etc.), but few things have managed to hit all of my author buttons like BTS’s HYYH saga. This is as brief of a summary as I can give (and if you know a lot about BTS, it’s probably missing something important and telling you old news, but bear with me here) – but the point of this is that their most recent “Love Yourself” trilogy that is making history for Korean and Global charts (and YouTube) has dealt with a lot of aspects of and thoughts about love.

The final part (Answer), which was released Friday, was about loving yourself and accepting yourself for who you are – not changing to love or be loved by anyone else. Idol, the title track, is a high-powered anthem about how the guys have accepted who they are and who they have become due to their international fame and recognition. It’s upbeat, powerful, and combines traditional Korean visuals and themes with dance pop and pulsing beats. And the video is a can’t-miss.

A giant shark is just one of many spectacles . . . ^^

I knew the album had dropped that night, but I wasn’t able to listen to any of it until much later, and by that time, I was in bed and just popped on my headphones to listen to the new songs. They were all good – but the reason I decided to write this post was because of the song Answer: Love Myself. It has minimal instrumentals, a retro, feel-good groove with gorgeous vocals and gentle rap lines, and it takes its time building up into an anthem-style pop song. All this is great, but it was the lyrics that really got me – as a culmination of the previous projects and because they hit so close to home.

To paraphrase here, the song basically talks about how it’s sometimes harder to love yourself than those around you, and how you make rules and standards for yourself to conform to that you can’t achieve, and you have to face and accept who you are, and that it might take a lifetime to do this. However, it does it with lovely imagery that you can read in a better (!) and full translation here. But I wanted to take a stab at translating it myself: DISCLAIMER – I am just an intermediate Korean student and if you see something I translated incorrectly tell me. Read BangtanTranslations if you want expert translations!

정답은 없을지도 몰라                            Maybe there isn’t a right answer*
어쩜 이것도 답은 아닌 거야                  Maybe/Perhaps this also isn’t an answer

그저 날 사랑하는 일조차                       It’s just that even for loving myself
누구의 허락이 필요했던 거야               I needed someone else’s permission

난 지금도 나를 또 찾고 있어                Right now I’m looking for myself/me again
But 더는 죽고 싶지가 않은 걸             But I don’t want to die anymore
슬프던 me                                                Sad me (past tense – me that was sad, etc)
아프던 me                                                Sick/hurt me (past tense again)
더 아름다울 美                                         (which will be) more beautiful (mei –                                                                                 Chinese character for beauty, sounds like ‘me’                                                                       the way they pronounce it)**

*The first line literally means they don’t know if a “correct answer” exists. **With the character 美 said as ‘me,’ this could read as “the me which will be more beautiful” – (Lyrics from Answer: Love Myself, Copyright @BigHit)

At any rate, this gives you an idea of what’s going on in the song, and why the lyrics might strike a chord! As I was feeling lonely and wondering why I couldn’t just let go and have fun with a group – especially since I was so thrilled about being in Korea – inevitably my thoughts turned to how the problem was me. And there is always some truth to that – it’s good to realize your deficiencies so you can change them. But sometimes it’s impossible to just love yourself and embrace who you are. No one can make you lovable, and changing who you are/how you are to gain others’ love isn’t the answer either. You have to love yourself for who you are, especially if you are going to become better. This is the overall message of BTS’s Love Yourself series (obviously?).

Words aren’t the answer to everything – sometimes they’re just a band-aid trying to fix a broken limb – but they are powerful and can be used to harm or heal. In conclusion – I want to sincerely thank every band, writer, singer, novelist, and other wordsmiths out there for using their words to speak the truth, explain, comfort, heal, encourage, and promote understanding.

“Epilogue: Young Forever” BTS/방탄소년단

**LINKS TO THE MASTERS (AKA Resources):

Three of my favorite experts who talk about Asian pop culture, representation, controversy (and a lot of other really interesting things):

Jae-Ha Kim (Journalist)

Ask a Korean (Fantastic Blogger)

Angry Asian Man (another fantastic Blog)

Great videos to explain Korean songs and MVs: DKDKTV explain Idol 

Dedicated fellow ARMY who spend their time translating everything BTS: BTS-Translations/Subs And their translation of Answer: Love Myself

Translations of the HYYH notes, posts, and articles: Glitter_jk

And last, but not least – an very abbreviated playlist of my songs for 1 AM  crises or when you need to be alone with your music:

Quarter Past Midnight – Bastille  – still one of my all-time favorites. Dan Smith has the most beautiful cry in his voice. *chills* –Okay? Happier, Good GriefBasket Case (Green Day cover) . . . JUST LISTEN TO EVERYTHING THIS MAN HAS EVER SUNG

Congratulations – Day6   A crazy talented Korean rock band with clever lyrics and great instrumentals. They put on a heck of a live show if they are ever near you!  I love everything Day6 has put out, and I would also highly recommend their recent single Shoot Me.

Prodigal SonRationale – ahh, I love Rationale so much. This track is pretty straightforward – about sons questioning their fathers’ absence. Rationale first dropped it at the end of 2016 (on Soundcloud).. R & B synthpop with African elements and influences would be the style here, and I love how Rationale takes his time with the melody, holding back his gorgeous baritone power vocals until the choruses. You should listen to the whole album.

Hold Me (feat. Ja Mezz)– MRSHLL . MRSHLL has been at the top of my list of newer artists I listen to all the time. His voice is like velvet – and his style of throbbing r & b with minimal instrumentals and excellent vocals – I love it so much. “Hold Me” is a chill song that you can get lost in for a few minutes.

Whalien 52  – BTS  (Lyrics Translation)

From Whalien 52

A song about a lonely whale (seriously) – it uses the metaphor of a whale that no other whales can hear (52-Hertz whale), in a scenario a lot like the situations I was describing above! It’s catchy but melancholy, and one of my favorite BTS songs ever. And while we’re talking favorite BTS songs – you should definitely listen to Spring Day/봄날 , which is one of my favorite songs in any language, and so perfectly captures bittersweet feelings and nostalgia. I can never decide if it makes me happy or sad though.

Dancing is Not a Crime – Panic! at the Disco. This is a feel-good Broadway-tinged song with the usual touch of despair via Brendon Urie’s phenomenal voice. I love the clever lyrics and the way he uses his voice to embellish them. (And the line “I’m a moonwalker, I’m like MJ up in the clouds – I know it sounds awkward . . . ^^)

Still New York – Max, Joey Bada$$. If you’ve ever been nostalgic about a place you will get this song. I love Max’s voice so much, and the lyrics really capture the NYC feel. It’s upbeat and has a great refrain to sing along to.

Cold Water – Justin Bieber, Major Lazer.  You can throw rocks at me later. I am fully aware that this is a Bieber song and that it was pretty popular. BUT – if you listen to the lyrics, it’s relatable, and it’s also a dance-worthy, feel-good guilty pleasure track that will stop your playlist from getting too low.

Missing Person – Michael W. Smith. This song is old – but the message and sincerity still  get me the way they did when I first heard it (I think I was 8?) It still convicts me and makes me think. And it’s really catchy with a unique sound.

Bring Back the Summer (feat. Oly) – Boehm Remix – Rain Man. For whatever reason, I really like dance pop? I love to dance myself (even though I’m terrible, lol). There isn’t much to this song, but it’s fun to dance or workout to, and still has traces of sadness under the throbbing beat.

The Light Behind Your Eyes – My Chemical Romance. One of my favorite songs from one of my favorite bands of all time (killjoys never die) – it’s far more gentle than the normal MCR song, but just as honest and thought-provoking.

Flip it over and – MAGIC

Save MeBTS. This is a song you immediately want to dance to (and the video is amazing, like all their videos) – but it has a desperation underlined by the repeated “Save Me, Save Me, I need your love before I fall, fall . . .” that alternates with soaring vocals. The first time I heard it, I couldn’t stop listening to it. Bonus: the sequel song “I’m Fine” is also fantastic.

Love Still Goes On – The Click Five. I have a thing for disbanded groups, which adds a bittersweet touch to any song. The Click Five have been close to my heart for years. This song is all snare-drums, synth, and power vocals. It’s a song about moving on, change, aging, and how love can continue through those things.

SomewhereWithin Temptation . WT are another band that I will always love – no one has ever topped their soaring symphonic metal. Anyhow, they are always a heavy rotation for me, but I tend to like the power ballads and higher octane songs best. Somewhere is not either of those things. It’s a gentle, hopeful song about finding someone/something – and persevering until you achieve your goal. Sharon’s voice has never been more beautiful or touching, and the lush strings and subtle backing vocals are the perfect accompaniment. The acoustic version with fellow rock vocalist Anneke Van Giersbergen is also phenomenal!

I Need U– BTS  – I promise I’ll quit it with the BTS after this (but really, you need to listen to their entire discography). I Need U is the song that really got me into BTS and into their album’s storyline. I think it’s the same for a lot of fans though. Something about the chorus, the video, the earnestness of it all – and the relatability (is that a word?) factor which is one of their biggest global draws.

Unknown (To You)  Timbaland Remix – Jacob Banks. Jacob Banks has one of those voices that makes you stop what you’re doing just to listen. If he sang through a dictionary, it would probably be worth listening to. The song I picked is one of those brooding, broken-hearted pleading ballads, and you can just feel the emotion of the lyrics through his voice. The strings, drum, and piano cushion for his voice is perfection.

Never Enough – Loren Allred. You will recognize this song if you saw The Greatest Showman. Gentle piano intro, theatricality, and a lovely melody suit the lyrics. This one tugs at your emotions but isn’t quite as easily embraced as the fantastic This is Me. I think it’s the raw ambition and dissatisfaction (of Never Enough) as opposed to the self-acceptance message^^. My only complaint is that Brendon Urie hasn’t done a cover of it.

Before the Sunset/해가 지기 전에 – Eric Nam  This song has the dubious claim of being one of the few songs that has made me cry on repeated occasions. So why is it on this list? The song is completely in Korean, but I think that the regret, sadness, and longing of the lyrics translate through the song and Eric Nam’s beautiful delivery. It’s from the Korean crime drama Mad Dog– which was also one of the best shows I watched in the past 2 years.

High HopesPanic! at the Disco – I think everyone has heard this song? But listen to the lyrics. This is probably one of the most relatable songs that Urie has ever written. It’s catchy and fun, but the dry observations about success and working hard are the real winners when you pair them with Brendon Urie’s vocal talent (I also highly recommend listening to Dying in LA).

OKAY – that was a really long post and I’m impressed if you made it to the end

I just had to get it off my chest, you know? Anyhow, is music like this for you, or not really? Do you recharge by seeing people or having time to yourself? Has there been a time in your life when words really helped or hurt you? Did you look at my playlist? Do you have songs to add? (I mean, if I put my whole playlist it would have been over 200 songs, lol).

Answers?

 

Look Mom, I’m an Exchange Student!

Ahh, orientation. Does anyone like orientations? I mean, they’re useful and necessary and all that . . . I’m sure someone enjoys them somewhere. And it isn’t all bad. You meet everybody, figure out where things are, and get to know your temporary home.

Call me a Scrooge, but they just aren’t my favorite. For someone who recharges by being alone and not having to talk to people – orientations are exhausting affairs.

Me after orientation

In any case, as soon as I made it to HGU (한동대학교), I was immersed in orientation. The first few days were a whirlwind of activities, new people and places, and finishing everything one must do to be an exchange student. For me, the highlights were 1. The international students and 2. the food. Our schedule had us getting up at around 7:00 am and being free to go to bed around 11:30 pm (23:30). Mornings started with breakfast at the cafeteria, then morning chapel, activities or tasks (such as going to immigration to register ourselves, or setting up a bank account), lunch, more activities that ranged from outdoor to icebreaker, dinner, evening chapel and maybe a lecture, and then team meetings before we could go to sleep.

Basically us

They kept pretty close tabs on us, and we had very little time to ourselves, but in the end, it did make us comfortable with each other and better equipped to study in a new school. My team was comprised of 11 people, including one leader to help us navigate and keep us on time. The 11 of us were all from different countries and spoke different native languages, so English was the one language we all had in common. Represented were

Korea, the US, Russia, China, Mongolia, Malawi, Hungary, the Netherlands, the Philippines, Nepal, and Germany, which was pretty amazing. Everyone in my group (and all of the rest of the students) were lovely, and they will all be fun to get to know better and hang out with during the semester.

And as for the food . . . sigh – kimchi with every meal, hot stews served in earthenware ttukbaegis (뚝배기), plentiful rice, and the opportunity to try more Korean dishes two times a day? Sign me up. I haven’t had anything bad since I’ve been in Korea, and the cafeteria offerings at HGU suit me just fine.

Stew or jjigae (찌걔)

Despite the food and people, by the time we reached Friday, I had major cabin fever, and I couldn’t wait to head back down into Pohang City center to explore. Since our official activities ended by Friday afternoon. My team (and most of the teams) went downtown and celebrated with Samgyupsal BBQ (삼겹실).

삼겹살!

(I’m getting hungry just thinking about it!) After dinner, some of us decided to go to the 노래방 (noraebang) – or the Korean version of karaoke – which is an extremely popular weekend activity in Korea. You pay for a room to yourselves, and (frequently) some drinks, and then sometimes some 안주 (anju – or snacks to go with alcohol) alongside the drinks. Couches and tables, a tv or two, and microphones are the most standard features. The one we went to had a bunch of songs in both Korean and English. Since we had an international group with differing levels of Korean (ranging from none to reading and singing ability), we stuck to classic pop songs that most of us knew.

노래방!

Singing loudly with friends and laughing at yourself is a good way to let off steam and tension that has built up over the week. And though I was shy at first, as I tend to be, once we were all singing our hearts out, it was easier (well, as easy as singing along to Michael Jackson ever is). One of the funniest moments was when you had three of us singing along to an iconic K-pop ballad by Taeyang (태양 from BIGBANG) “Eyes, Nose, Lips” (눈, 코, 입) – China, US, and Hungary represent! To be honest, an hour at the noraebang did more for my comfort level than every icebreaker, and I can’t wait to go back soon.

We were quite responsible, and came back to the dorms after the noraebang. As a side note, this is the first time I’ve ever lived in a dorm! Saturday morning was spent mainly cleaning those dorms and then moving our stuff out so we could transfer to our permanent room (the rooms we’d been in were temporary arrangements for orientation). Once the dust settled, we were able to move our things back in to the rooms that will now be ours for the next four months. My roommates are from Argentina (but Korean by birth), Mongolia, and China, and they are all really nice girls. We are all on the same team (remember the teams from orientation? HGU does this every year, and has big teams that the small orientation teams meld into after the semester starts. Each team then has a professor as a mentor, and exists to give each other support and help us have friends during the semester.

As exchange students, it didn’t take us long to unpack. But once we did, we saw what we were missing, and decided  it was time for a trip to the Japanese bargain chain Daiso. Daiso is basically the nicer version of a dollar store, where you can buy most household necessities for low

DAISO

prices. On the other hand, everything is also cute, and you can find yourself finding small gadgets that you don’t really need! I managed to avoid buying a lot of things, but it was a narrow escape.

 

After Daiso, a group of us went out for Dak Galbi (닭갈비). Dak Galbi is a savory, spicy chicken dish with veggies cooked in a big pan in the middle of the table. You can add rice, kimchi, rice cakes, and various other ingredients as well. It was absolutely fantastic, and to feed 8 of us, it cost about 7.50/8 US per person (including the one bottle of soju that some of us split).  Though I’ve been in Korea for two weeks now, I still can’t get over the amazing deals you can get on

Dak Galbi

absolutely delicious food. It’s definitely a highlight. Still, since I’m on a very slim budget, I’ve also eaten a lot of triangle gimbap!

 

For me, triangle gimbap (삼각김밥) will forever be linked to the main character of the Korean tv show Good Doctor (and yes, the US show with the same name is a remake of the Korean one, and it is also excellent!). If you have never watched a Korean drama but you like medical series, then Good Doctor is an excellent recommendation. I watched it after work during the summer, and though it sometimes tended toward the melodramatic, over all, it was a great show with really good acting and sympathetic characters. The lead actor, Joo Won, plays a savant but autistic doctor named Park Shion, and it is a fantastic performance. Anyhow, in the show, Shion basically lives off of triangle gimbap since he can’t cook and doesn’t have a lot of money or friends to go eat with ;P Thinking about Shion and the gimbap made it more fun to be living off of it myself!! (at 900 won each [80 cents] – you can’t beat it).

Passive-aggressive gimbap eating

But back to the point – I survived orientation week and am now settled into my first dorm and getting used to the routine as a Handong Student. The campus is not as big as that of my home university, so it is an easy walk to any classroom. There are trails to explore behind it (if it would stop raining! We’ve been under typhoon warnings for a week and had lots of rain), mountains and a beach nearby, and the town of Pohang barely explored. Currently, I have only signed up for 13 credit hours (the least I’ve ever taken), and so I hope to be able to explore on weekends, and maybe be able to read another book or two! I’ve also been writing since I got here, and today I was able to sketch. I’m not naive enough to think that this absolute peace will last (because it’s school!!), but so far, just being able to do some of the things I love most has been so therapeutic. (And a certain BTS album coming out at the same time hasn’t hurt, but more on that next post).

Okay – so that was a random string of events – hopefully not too boring! Have you ever been an exchange student? How was the school different from your school? Do you like orientations? If so, why? Am I just a Scrooge? Have you had triangle gimbap or any of the other foods I’ve mentioned? Do you like medical dramas? Most importantly, have you been to a Noraebang? I’d love to know in the comments 😉

 

School-Induced Hiatus and a Thanksgiving Update

That’s a promise . . .

Anyhow, I’ve been on unintentional school-induced hiatus since, well, September, and I’ve been itching to write a blog post. The problem? I have no time. Thanksgiving “Break” just started, and I have 3 papers to work on before I head in to work at 4pm . . .

Yet here I am – itching to give a bit of an update for anyone who might still read this!

How ARE you? I feel out of touch. How is your writing/blogging/reading? Are you doing anything fun during Thanksgiving?

Since the last time I wrote a blog post, I took on 16 credit hours of school and another job (at a Korean BBQ – more on that later). I also moved (temporarily) to Grand Rapids and obtained two awesome roommates. And I feel really, really old (this is all related, trust me).

Since it’s the eve of Thanksgiving, I’m not here to rant about any of that – or about anything that’s been happening in this crazy world since September.

Instead, I’m updating you guys on my general life, and writing about a few things I’m grateful for.

SO – school happened. I feel like I’m on a strange island populated by twentysomethings – or like an alien that crash-landed on campus (seriously, the looks I get when I say I’m 27, technically a freshman, and I have eleven siblings . . . hehehe)

I'm like Mister Do Min Joon, but not as pretty
I’m like Mister Do Min Joon, but not as pretty

Which leads into Thanksgiving:

  • I am incredibly grateful for the aforementioned roommates (both of whom are gems of humanity, and 25-year-old grad students, so around my age)
  • I am grateful for my Korean professor – she makes coming to class worth it every morning, even when I’m exhausted – and she encourages me to keep on swimming. Also, for my philosophy professor, who single-handedly made me rethink my whole scholastic pursuit by suggesting we think of them as spiritual disciplines – and for giving me an excuse to finally get around to reading Gandhi’s autobiography.
  • I am thankful that I have a car, a job, a roof over my head, shoes, and a bed to sleep in.
  • I am thankful that I have a job, and people who value me there.
  • I am thankful for every person in GR/Calvin that made a point of reaching out to me, remembered my name and made a point of saying hi, and for everyone that has been kind in any way to me – you will probably never know how much a friendly smile or a kind word can mean at the right time. Thank you.
  • I am grateful to have a novel under contract, even if it keeps getting delayed
  • I am thankful for the freedom of speech, the freedom to read whatever I want, and write whatever I want, and speak the truth – and the freedom to protest if any of those things are challenged
  • I am grateful for the wordsmiths that boost me up – whether they are singers, or poets, or writers, or just darn good speakers that lift your spirits or keep you going
  • I am thankful for the writers, readers, and bloggers that I have enjoyed reading or chatting with – you are beautiful people
  • I am thankful for my family – especially my parents, siblings, and grandparents – your love and support keeps me sane (ish)
  • I am thankful for the God of truth and justice, and for the Savior who makes all things unlovely to be lovely, and has compassion and love for the broken and unlovable

And now, since I am (for once) being completely serious and reflective – have some words to think on as we hurtle toward 2017:

  • “It is in times of security that the spirit should be preparing itself to deal with difficult times; while fortune is bestowing favors on it then is the time for it to be strengthened against her rebuffs.” Seneca, Letters from a Stoic
  • “Each of us, no matter how good, is fallen, and each of us, no matter how evil, is as beloved as the prodigal son . . . The line between good and evil doesn’t run between people, but down the center of every heart . . . St. Paul said we should do nothing from selfishness or conceit, but in humility count others better than ourselves. This is the exact opposite of what we naturally want; we want others to count us better than them. . . loving ourselves is what causes all the trouble . . . We should love others the way we instinctively love ourselves.” Frederica Mathewes-Green, The Illumined Heart
  • “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For you if you love those who love you, what reward do you have?” (Matthew 5: 43-46b)
  • “So long as a man does not of his own free will put himself last among his fellow creatures, there is no salvation for him.” Gandhi, The Story of my Experiments with Truth
  • “Perhaps someone may say, But surely, Socrates, after you have left us you can spend the rest of your life in quietly minding your own business. This is the hardest thing of all to make some of you understand. If I say that this would be disobedience to God, and that is why I cannot ‘mind my own business,’ you will not believe that I am serious. If on the other hand I tell you that to let no day pass without discussing goodness and all the other subjects about which you hear me talking and examining both myself and others is really the very best thing that a man can do, and that life without this sort of examination is not worth living, you will be even less inclined to believe me.” Plato, Socrates’ Defense
  • ‘How is a man to judge what to do in such times?’
    As he has ever judged,’ said Aragorn. ‘Good and evil have not changed since yesteryear, nor are they one thing among Elves and another among Men. It is a man’s part to discern them, as much in the Golden Wood as in his own house.”
    J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers
  • “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”
    C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

We all have a lot to be grateful for, and we can’t let ourselves forget it. Happy reading and writing, and have a safe and lovely Thanksgiving <3

~R

 

Sorry Honey, I Forgot Our Blogoversary . . .

SO, I figured out that my blog’s anniversary was August 13th . . . and then I worked a 65 hour week and didn’t think about it at all.*

So I’m doing a belated Blogoversary post for myself. That means I will use an inordinate amount of gifs and jibber about nothing for at least a page; you have been warned.

I’ve been blogging for a bit now, but I’ve only been consistent for about a year. In that time, I’ve made some awesome friends, and had a lot of fun getting some words out there. More importantly, I feel like the writing connection with others (and the helpful feedback) has made me a better writer, and made me a more efficient writer.

I answered a lot of the “Why do you blog” questions on this tag from blogger Victoria Grace, so I’ll skip that. Also, you probably have heard more random facts about me than you ever needed! So I’ll skip that too. Instead, I think I’ll write a bit about my past year in blogging, and where I see myself going.

As most of you probably know, I had my debut novel scheduled for August publication.

Unfortunately, it’s already September (yes, I’m screaming), and I have yet to hear back from my publishers on a new, concrete date. They haven’t done something terrible like close down or drop my book, they’ve just pushed everything back in their schedule because: LIFE HAPPENS. No one knows this better than me, but it doesn’t make it easy. In fact, it’s made my last couple months rougher mentally than I would like.

In the meantime, I’ve been trying to stay positive and work on the many writing projects (new and old) that I have. I’ve also kept myself reading – because my love of reading is what got me writing, and it’s still my favorite pastime. It’s also good to get other people’s’ words and ideas flowing through your head, just like it’s good to have conversations with various people and not always be stuck in your own brain!

A Few Things I’ve Been Working on Between Last August and Now:

Promoting:

Knight of the Blue Surcoat, my delayed but still debut novel – an Arthurian historical fantasy adventure starring King Arthur’s daughter Melora. More about it here.

Editing:

The Last Coffee Shop (TLCS)- A snarky, post-apocalyptic adventure novel that involves a barista, a bounty hunter, a dancing thief, and a lot of aliens. Read more about it here.

Drafting:

Red as Blood – A genderbent Snow White retelling set in the same “world” as TLCS, just a decade or so later. It involves high fashion, corruption, food service, and quirky, damaged characters. More about that here, and in my current series of Beautiful People posts. September’s entry will be up soon!

Reading:

Scads of research books for a planned Japanese folktale retelling, and a few for an epic fantasy idea that I’ve been tossing around.

ARCS – as many as I can get to, for my day job as a bookseller. Standouts include Vassa in the NightBlood for Blood, and Patchinko.

Most recent reads: Tokyo Ghoul Volume 8 (<3t_t KEN!) and Malice by Keigo Higashino (Japanese mystery).

Learning:

Korean, and lots of other things – to be continued below . . .

Cooking:

If you follow me on Instagram, you might have seen my random kitchen projects. Kimchi-in-everything has been the theme. I’ve progressed to a proper kimchi storage container, so I can make as much kimchi jjigae (김치찌개) as I want!! Other things, such as Korean BBQ, fresh tuna sushi, Thai curries, the usual pies and scones, and many other things happened in my kitchen between work and other work.

Watching:

Obviously, I haven’t had much time to watch anything. However, I did finish the Korean Comedy/Horror/Drama “Let’s Fight, Ghost!” and it was hilarious (and actually a little creepy at times). I also started watching PinocchioCity Hunter, and a big-budget Chinese drama called Ice Fantasy. If you’re interested in hearing more about my tv watching habits, check out this post. AND PEOPLE – if you aren’t watching W: Two Worlds, you should! Not only do we get Lee Jong Suk being a fabulous action hero, it’s a reality-bending drama about being sucked into/out of a manhwa (만화 – Korean comics) and it has a rather Christopher Nolan-esque/postmodern feel about it that is pretty unique.

Oh, and Lee Jong Suk = reasons to watch anything. No, I’m completely unbiased.

ANYHOW.

The last movie I saw was Suicide Squad – and I had very mixed feelings about it. It felt like two different movies competing with each other, and I thought that it would have been better off as a goofy heist-style movie. Everything from the message to the storytelling was muddled (and I seem to be in the 1% who thought the Joker was in there too much – and I’d thought he was the main villain from the trailers . . .). And honestly, the villain (Tia Dalma 2.0, supermodel edition) was completely underwhelming. That being said, the main cast was good and parts of it were very fun/funny – and there were some excellent soundtrack choices.

I’m really looking forward to Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find ThemMiss Peregrine’s wasn’t my favorite book – I found it rather boring, and the romance was really the only unnerving thing about it, but the movie looks pretty cool. And of course I’m excited about Fantastic Beasts! It looks like breath of cinematic fresh air.

Listening to:

Other than the usual, I’ve really been liking Korean rockers F.T. Island‘s mixture of pop-punk and excellent vocals/instrumentals. Other notable current favorites include BØRNS (Michigan Native!), For the Foxes, EXO and B.A.P‘s dance-y recent offerings, The Unlikely Candidates, and Icelandic rockers Kaleo.

Also in music, I compiled an ultimate Last Coffee Shop Playlist (around 100 tracks) that gives you a great audio picture of the novel – and it includes a lot of the songs I listened to while writing TLCS as well.

Work:

Err, that. Back in February, I took on a second job at a new craft brewery, in addition to working part-time as a bookstore manager/head book-buyer, writing reviews for a women’s mag, and my own personal writing/reading work . . . so, yes. Anyhow, it’s been fun, but I think the crazy work fest might be over for the year.

Travel:

Besides travelling to Nashville and back in three days, I’ve been to Pensacola (for a day, but well, it was a good day), Gulf Shores, Chicago (4 times!), Traverse City, Harbor Springs, and all that jazz. I manage to clock a lot of road hours for someone who is rarely away from work, 😛

Life:

I GOT A NEPHEW!!! I already had a niece (and she’s one of the most precious, sweet, and mild-mannered little angels ever), but as of the end of June, I have a nephew too. He’s adorable and cuddly, and I got to go see him way too briefly in July.

So you remember I was learning Korean?

Well, last fall, after some serious contemplation/soul-searching/finance-shuffling, etc, I decided I’d be interested in putting some of my savings toward a few more college courses (I have some credits, but that’s all). I’ve always wanted to travel, travel write, and make it to East Asia. Not to mention, my passion for Asian History has had me reading courses worth of books for years. SOooo, I thought, well, a degree in East Asian Studies? Worth it? Maybe a foray into International Relations, or a certificate for teaching ESL? My number one goal has always (and probably will always be) to be a published author, but that travelling/teaching/exploring side is loud too. I want to write, in other places. So this meandering paragraph just means, I’m going back to school, as long as I can afford it . . . At least I’ll have a whole class of people to practice Korean with!!

Related to this – readers might remember how my sister and I had to leave our rental and ended up back with our parents? Well, I’m going to move (at least till December) down to Grand Rapids, and commute to my bookstore job in between. So I can’t see the craziness letting up any time soon, but it will probably be a bit more organized now. *Gulp*

And while I’m on the subject of school, I’m attending a college that really is quite a nontraditional place for an adult student – and it feels like I’m in class with high schoolers – I feel so awkward and out of place. So there’s that. I thought about doing a series about what it feels like to go back to school at 27 (on a small enough campus to where you can feel it). So that might be a thing . . . It’s amazing how isolated you can feel when you’re surrounded by thousands of people. Don’t get me wrong, I love being by myself, but trading in 65hr work weeks for 65hr work-and-school weeks is kind of lonely, you know? But I know that I have you guys to talk to! (And believe me, it’s comforting)

So that’s it – that’s all there is in a nutshell. Happy Belated Blogoversary to me! (Also, happy 추석 to my Korean friends out there!)

(I love Lurch’s dancing because we can all do better – sorry Lurch)

If you blog, when’s your blogoversary? Have you ever thought about going back to school after leaving it? Would you read a series about going back to school as an adult student?

What have you been up to this September? Conversation is delightful ;P

*I didn’t forget my beloved Bigbang’s anniversary though (August 19th). Priorities, priorities . . .

 

Beautiful People Part II (August): Introducing Phaidra Callas-Yu (Red as Blood)

10928109_595959117172101_1450331761_nWhen I saw August’s theme, and Cait’s awesome gifs to go with it, I just knew that I had to drop the Seven Sisters in favor of another extremely important character in Red as Blood: Sull’s stepmother, the formidable model, dancer, and actress “Calla Fay.”

No Snow White retelling would be complete without it’s “evil queen,” and since this BP was all about appearances, it’s too perfect.

But first, a little bio:
Name: Phaidra Yu, nee Callas          Nickname: Calla Fay

Age: 25     Height: 1.82 meters       Weight: Really?

Phaidra Callas burst onto the modelling scene at the young age of fourteen. From the beginning, her startling beauty, poise, and charming sweetness made her a star, and agencies were practically fighting to sign her. Nevertheless, she kept her current manager (her mother) until her mother's tragic passing in a freak accident when Phaidra was sixteen. 
Phaidra disappeared (presumably in mourning) for a month, and then came back as "Calla Fay" the female face of SnøFall - the groundbreaking fashion line by young designer Yu Hayato  (유 하야토). This was the first time she met Yu, and his motherless son, who was the other face of SnøFall. Phaidra's star continued to rise, and she made further news by marrying Yu four years later. The "King and Queen of Galactic Fashion" were unstoppable - or so everyone thought.
  1. Give a brief overview of their looks. (Include a photo if you want!)

I imagine that Phaidra looks quite a bit like this photo of classic actress and beauty, Gene Tierney
I imagine that Phaidra looks quite a bit like this photo of classic actress and beauty, Gene Tierney

Hair: Natural black      Eyes: Lavender-grey
Skin: Flawless ivory

2. Share a snippet that involves description of their appearance.

Well – I don’t actually have a snipped that describes Phaidra right now (since I’m playing around with first person), but I will share one of the random snippets I wrote about her as a practice exercise/character development tool. Note that it probably won’t be part of the book and it’s completely unedited, but it gives you a little taste –

The woman was undeniably beautiful, with her doe-eyed expression and milky white limbs curving through the swaths of silver and gold, but it was the child who stole your breath away. It was hard to look at the woman with him there, this creature of nearly indeterminate gender, whose dark eyes held more sorrow than any child’s should. It was then, after looking close, that you might notice the woman again. You might see how her hand rested on the child’s shoulder, a little too heavy for comfort. You might note how her long, silky black hair draped onto the child, mixing with his own locks in a tangle of confusion. Then you would notice how even the extra fabric from her dress somehow shrouded the child, framing his small body and miring his feet in a swamp of exquisite silk. Last of all, you would look back into her eyes, so clear and crystalline that they might have been liquid, and you might feel uncomfortable when you saw how empty they were. And you would turn away, and try to forget their expressions – but you couldn’t get their frozen stares out of your mind. It’s just an ad, you would think to yourself, it doesn’t mean anything.

3. What is the first thing people might notice about them?

Phaidra’s eyes. They are piercing, crystalline lavender grey, with extra long lashes and an extraordinary sparkle to them. Though she has been (quietly) accused of enhancing them, no records exist to prove it.

4. What are their unique features? (Ex: freckles, big ears, birthmark, scars, etc.)

Phaidra’s only “imperfection” is a tiny, heart-shaped mole under her left eye. Otherwise, her skin seems poreless, and her features are suspiciously symmetrical.

5. How tall are they? What is their build (Ex: stocky, slender, petite, etc.)

Phaidra is around 5 ft, 10 inches tall (just a couple of inches shorter than her husband).

Delicate bone structure, immaculate features, and a perfectly proportioned, long-limbed, graceful body made Phaidra one of the most galactically popular models of all time. She has been voted the “Most Beautiful Woman in the Galaxy” for the past six years.

6. What is their posture like? How do they usually carry themselves?

Phaidra carries herself like royalty. She is the queen of a fashion empire, after all. Her posture is perfect, and she moves with an unhurried grace that has been compared to large, predatory cats.

7. Your character has been seen on a “lazy day” (free from usual routine/expectations): what are they wearing and how do they look?

Minimal makeup and exclusive designer loungewear that cost more than some average citizen’s house. One of the perks of being married to a designer is that Phaidra is never wearing the same thing as anyone else.

8. Do they wear glasses, accessories, or jewelry on a regular basis? Do they have any article of clothing or accessory that could be considered their trademark?

Phaidra’s trademark is a pair of silver crown shaped earrings that she never removes. They were rumored to be a gift from her mother, but she has never explained their origin. However, she refuses to take them off, so designers and stylists have had to work around them. Other than these, Phaidra wears whatever accessories are dictated by her current job.

9. Have they ever been bullied or shamed because of their looks? Explain!

Phaidra’s “perfect” looks have been under scrutiny ever since she debuted at fourteen as the face of a popular perfume. There has been a debate over everything from plastic-surgery to rumors that she was forced into modelling by her mother. However, ultimately it all comes down to how she looks. Despite the criticism and harsh accusations she’s received over the years, Phaidra seems to glow brightest when she’s being attacked, almost as if she welcomes any attention at all . . .

10. Are they happy with how they look? If they could change anything about their appearance, what would it be?

Yes. Phaidra has said that she would rather die than be ugly, and that her looks are really all she has. The only thing she would change is her age – though she’s only twenty-five, she lives in constant terror of her looks fading and wilting with age. There is an entire lab (funded by Phaidra herself) devoted to finding products and routines that will hold back her aging process as long as possible.

So that’s Phaidra, folks. Since this was all about looks, I feel like we only just scraped the darkness and complexity of her character – but that’s just too fitting. Most people (okay, characters in my world) have evaluated/judged Phaidra by looks alone. As you all know, this can lead to misconceptions, misjudgments, and be a terrible mistake.

So what did you think? How important are appearances to your current characters? Red as Blood is the first project of mine to have appearances be pivotal to the plot!

 Did you all do this month’s BP? If so, leave a link so I can check yours out!

 

 

Beautiful People Part I (from July): Meet The General (Red as Blood)

In the monthly Beautiful People (hosted/originated by Cait @ Paper Fury and Skye @ Further Up and Further In, and you can read all about it HERE.), I’ve been exploring the rather large cast of my current WIP, Red as Blood. And though I started to do the July feature back in, well, July, I never finished it – so I’m posting it today. Check back soon for BP Part II, which will feature the August questions and another pivotal character from Red as Blood.

So, if you need a refresher on Red as Blood or some of the major characters, check out these posts, and for more on the Seven Sisters, here’s the link to their general bio.

Next up is the third sister – Ayan Stonefist – more commonly known as “The General.” Here’s a photo and a quick recap of her bio:

A younger but pretty accurate Ayan reference photo
A younger but pretty accurate Ayan reference photo

Don’t be fooled by her small stature - she can, and will, destroy you. The General has one of the best tactical minds of the last century, and it’s a mystery why she’s working at an out-of-the-way food joint. Actually, most everything about her is a mystery, and she’d prefer it stay that way.

Age:  early forties (or so the Sisters guess)

Occupation: Assistant Manager of Henpecked Bar & Grill. But that’s just what it says on paper . . .

Height: 135 cm?    Weight: Unknown    Race: Human?

Weakness: *whispers* Don’t even tell her we asked.

Weapon of Choice: Throwing knives or a good spear

Likes: Order, cleanliness, and quiet. Sharp blades. Maps. Dogs.

Dislikes: Bad manners. Insubordinate people. Disorder. Cats.

Favorite Food: Strawberries (she has a surprising sweet tooth)

Of all of the sisters, Ayan is the most reserved and forbidding. However, she exudes calm and excels at managing diverse and difficult personalities. Sull tries to avoid her as much as possible, yet he admires the way she carries herself – as if she’s twenty feet tall and all corded muscle – anyone in her way will be ten feet under . . .

So, now, let’s attempt to get to know The General a bit better.

  1. Does she  want to get married and/or have children? Why or why not?

This isn’t the sort of thing the General thinks about, to be honest. She’s never desired children, and she has zero interest in any sort of life partner or romance. Still, she isn’t opposed to mentoring a young person, and she did very well as the leader of armies. As a general rule, Ayan feels that children are a nuisance, and that they are a danger to everyone if their parents didn’t really want them. Sull basically affirms everything that Ayan believed about kids. 😛

2. What is their weapon of choice? (It doesn’t necessarily have to be a physical weapon.)

I answered this in her profile (throwing knives or a spear), but the General is one of those people who can use anything for an effective weapon. Her brain is her other favorite weapon though 😛

3. What’s the nicest thing they’ve done for someone else, and why did they do it?

When Ayan had command of a particularly large group of young men (soldiers), she caught one of them stealing food from the stores. Normally, that sort of thing was punishable by discharge and the removal of a hand, and the General had not hesitated to carry out the sentence before. However, after investigating the situation, she discovered that the soldier had taken the food for a group of orphans that had lost their parents in the current battles. Ayan looked into this and allowed the soldier to go with only extended latrine duty. She then set up a fund for the children, and personally found them all homes, despite her general dislike of children. When asked why she did it, all the General would say is that war “wasn’t right, and that no one but the instigators should suffer the consequences.”

4. Have they ever been physically violent with someone, and what instigated it?

She is the General – so 99% of her existence has been in the more violent spheres of life – but she isn’t violent without cause or reason. Rather, she only uses physical violence as a last resort.

5. Are they a rule-follower or a rebel?

While Ayan is usually a rule-follower (she believes that rules exist for a reason), she isn’t afraid to color outside the lines, so to speak. If she truly believes an action is right or wrong, she won’t hesitate to act accordingly.

6. Are they organized or messy?

Highly organized. The General despises anything remotely disordered or messy.

7. What makes them feel loved, and who was the last person to make them feel that way?

The General believes that love is like down comforters or a good mattress: comfortable and a life enhancement, but not necessary for a fulfilling existence. Her soldiers usually loved her, but she discouraged it, as she thought it encouraged an unnatural level of risk-taking and devotion (when she was in a dangerous situation).

8. What do they eat for breakfast?

The General strives for balance in every area of life, so she makes sure that her breakfast is nutritious and balanced, with just the right amount of calories to keep her going until the next meal. That being said, she’s partial to strawberry pancakes.

9. Have they ever lost someone close to them? What happened?

While Ayan tries to maintain a professional distance between herself and those around her, she has witnessed the deaths of many young soldiers. The General feels personally connected to every soldier under her command, and every loss or death has made her strive to be a better commander.

10. What’s their treat of choice? (Or, if not food, how else do they reward themselves?)

The General has a sweet tooth, so she will occasionally indulge in one of Dumpling‘s famous strawberry shortcakes. But only if she has had an extremely stressful day, or she feels quite satisfied with herself.

So that’s all for today- do you feel like you know the General a little bit better? (She’s rather enigmatic). Did you do July’s BP? How is your August going, and what are you writing/reading?